Is life some sort of test that I must persevere in? Must I battle on, ensuring I hold on to determination and hope? To come out victorious, is that what I should do? If so, kill me now, for I do care about getting the pride to my name.
I see this now, God. I really do. What you fling to me time and time again. But my foundations are slowing slipping, slowly wavering – on the brink of collapse.
I will be able to stand no longer if you keep thrashing me with these all. For I know, I shall become an empty vessel cascading down this current of black sands.
These currents push down on me as I try to claw myself out. For a moment or two, the world mourns for the fact that I am drowning.
Another test, God?
I do not want persevere this time.
I try wading out, I try pushing back against this current but all I do is further plunder deeper and deeper.
My essence is leaving me.
I have awaited eagerly for this day for the time when an external sleep washes over me…an abode where none can awaken me.
Upon setting my paw outside into the unknown, I was horrified at what lay in front of me. I, until a few weeks ago, remembered this place as the river which slipped twinkling over golden grains of sand, gazed down by trees that showered pink, blue and purple. They were garnished adoringly by leaves fanning out from the branches which majestically displayed its splendour. Of course, I told Pippa and Ayia underground, who had yet to come of age, of the blue black smoke that wafted elegantly covering the small sparkling Gods. They seemed to worship the Lune which instead bathed the brown blades. It was until only a few weeks that my home appeared to be the beacon of love, life and laughter but now it seemed Death had held it captive, adding it to its vast collection.
The scene now around me shattered, scattered, the little remorse I had for these human beings. Mumma had murmured tales of history – surrender of the moles and then, the starvation. She said it was occurring again and that I mustn’t venture out. Yet I did. I pity my decision for my eyes now rested on the harmless blue-green bellies protruding from the surfaces of the coalmine-like river; thousands set in ordered rows in all directions. These were the last efforts made by creatures who had tried all they could just to live on for another day.
I scrounged forward disregarding the ramblings of harm caused by smell or touch that I had been warned of. Surely this was the act of those who purposely wished to asphyxiate us, fear monger us and banish our hopes. For I am one to not stand idle, however I am one that will stand for my own, my family, not for greed nor pleasure – but for what is right and what we truly deserve. As I scrambled forward, the pure horror became visible. Trees had slumped forward dead, it’s now dark locks matted by the sticky substance. The pure magnificence even in death dazzled me. The branches twisted and curled around its bark as if to protect itself, yet it could not. They had been deserted by its leaves; pieces of brown hovered until finally resting at the feet as if they were sacrifices given to satiate the vengeful Gods. All life had been corrupted by this darkness, poisoned by the blackness, only instigated by arrogance and yet the Lune stared silently. She just watched and stared.
I nosed my way closer, willing my paw to enter the sea. What would Mumma say if she saw me now? What would Papa? I’ll show them though. By bringing some back, and getting dear Pippa to analyse it, we’ll surely find a way to fight back. I dipped my paw cautiously into the water. Nothing happened. I edged a bit further. Nothing happened. Maybe our race was protected by the Lune? As I contemplated the possibilities, the wind slapped me and I fell hurling into the rageful wrath of the sea. Clumps of slime entered my mouth and yet no matter the amount if times I coughed and choked, it remained lodged, draining my lifeforce. I tried to swash through the barriers preventing me of returning yet I failed. I, covered in rot, could not move my fully formed legs or arms. Failed with hopelessness, my last moments were to ask the Lune why she had forsaken me. Misted by the oncoming conquerings of Death, I was regretfully beckoned by the future – the husband I would never have, the children. Hatred spurted out of me.
The serene atmosphere around me had been invaded by the impending threat, and I too was going to be its prey, for no one was exempt from the deeds of the humans. I, too, was going to be the prey of the black poison.